She had a wedding to go to, and needed a wedding gift. Aha, she thought, I have that monogrammed silver tray from my wedding that I never use. I’ll just take it to a silversmith and have him remove my monogram and put hers on it. Voila, one cheap wedding present.”
She took it to the silversmith and asked him to remove her monogram and put the new one on. The silversmith examined the tray carefully, shook his head and said, “Lady, this can only be done so many times!”
Father O’Shea, the parish priest in the village, was giving a sermon about charity. He said, “The trouble with the world today is that some people have too much and others have too little. We must give of ourselves and our worldly goods to help the less fortunate.”
He said to Harrigan, “If you had ten thousand pounds, wouldn’t you give half of it to the poor?”
He said, “I would that, Father.”
The priest said, “If you had two greyhounds, wouldn’t you give one of them to your neighbour next door?”
Harrigan said, “No.”
The priest said, “And why not?”
He said, “I have two greyhounds.”
